Moments, Memories, & Jazz

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Dear Lord (Happy Birthday, John Coltrane)

Published by Laurie Early

I arrived back from Italy on Monday night; I was totally exhausted, and literally bruised, from traveling back with luggage that was far heavier than what I had brought with me. Yes, I was unwise and brought back groceries for my daughter that turned out to be very heavy. I am not sorry I packed them, but if I had to do it over again I would have taken a taxi to the train instead of pulling my bags from San Lorenzo to Termini. I tell this part of the story to set the stage for the wonderful piece of music that was waiting for me in an instant message.

You see, when I arrived home I felt totally numb creatively, but then I turned my telephone back on and John Coltrane’s “Dear Lord” was waiting for me. A jazz friend “across the pond” sent it to me while I was traveling and my phone was in airplane mode.

I listened and immediately in my mind I heard the opening line in words–always a wonderful surprise. I wrote them down. I felt my energy return and a flood of emotion–so grateful for the music that surrounds me now, that keeps my heart light and my life worth living.

I wrote a couple more lines for the following phrases, turned off my phone, and drifted off to sleep. The next day I listened again, pausing after each phrase to wait for the words to come to me, for the prayer/story to unfold. So, by Tuesday evening I had about half of the words and I was already very grateful.

I tried to have it all finished by Friday, the anniversary of Coltrane’s birthday, September 23rd, but the words for the final phrases did not emerge until today, the 24th. I can sing it, but it is not an especially good key for me; I will need to transpose and practice my ass off to get it correct. (His phrasing and timing are so lovely on this song.)

Here are the lyrics and a link to the specific YouTube video I listened to this week.

(I dedicate my words to everyone I love, everyone I want to keep safe, and everyone who has gone on to an adventure where I cannot follow, yet.)

Dear Lord,
Keep him safe from all harm,
bring him back here to my arms.
(Please Lord, keep him safe)

He’s dear to my heart!
And I need him,
oh, you know Lord, that I need him so.

He’s my soul!
And, there has never been another for me; No.
Oh, you know how I much I love him.
(Oh, Lord, I’m begging you now please, save him)

What can I do?
How I need him! I need him, you know it’s so true.

He’s the world to me!
And I’m nothing without him but an empty shell.
(Yes, I beg you, Lord)

And if I’m left all on my own now.
(I don’t know what I will do without him in my life; I can’t breathe)

My heart cannot bear it!
(Oh, please Lord, my heart is pleading now with you. )

I’m so afraid!
There is nothing that I wouldn’t do.
(Yes, it’s true)

I am cryin’ inside, oh, I miss him so
(Is there hope? I don’t know, Lord)

What is left now for me, Lord?
Can I get through tomorrow,
knowing that he will no longer be there?

Please answer my prayer,
I beg you, Lord.
Tell me, what is love? dear Lord.

[Love is all that matters now to me, dear Lord]

Everyday Epiphanies

Published by Laurie Early

Random Things About Me

Published by Laurie Early

So, hello, hi there! Here is something a little unexpected, a summer “fluff” post that you will hopefully find entertaining and maybe even educational about what memories are stored in my mind. It is a list of 16 random things about me. They are in no particular order, *smile*.

1. When I worked in a corporate setting, at approximately 3 PM, almost every day, I hiccuped. Usually just one, and then it was over. I have no idea why. At the office, a colleague who sat next to me always noted the time and commented on how close to 3 PM I was. (Since I began telecommuting a few years ago, the 3 PM hiccup is no more. I still hiccup now and then, but not on a strict schedule.)

2. My favorite TV program is Eastenders. “Trials and tribulations impact lives in a close-knit community in London’s East End” I love it! I have been watching it since 1987. I found it on a UHF channel before I had cable – it was one of the few things I could get as reception where we were living at the time was incredibly poor. Then I got hooked! If you live in another country PLEASE DO NOT tell me what has happened on the show in the last 10 years as the US airings have fallen so far behind the original airings in the UK. I’ve heard they show three or four episodes a week there and in New York City we only see 2, if we are lucky, some weeks there are no episodes aired at all. So you see, we fall further and further behind each year.

3. When I started college, my late father-in-law, Judge Early, gave me his family piano. It had the name “Early” hand painted in gold on the backboard (right over the middle “C”). The thought of this special gift has become a symbol of all the support he gave me as I was finding my voice. I was very attached to that piano and it made practicing and learning my school assignments so easy; I did not have to reserve practice rooms on the campus. I often wonder where that piano is now. While waiting to move between apartments it was stored in a relative’s garage and before I could get it back it was sold, without my knowledge, to someone I don’t know. (Still makes me sad to think about it.)

[I have a photo of this piano somewhere in my crazy storage space, I mean my apartment, and when I find it I will insert it here.]

4. If I could drink only one beverage for the rest of my life it would be hot green tea.

5. The first “song” I consciously remember writing (which I called “Shake it Up, Baby!“) was created when I was 6 years old. I was walking home from school and I know exactly where on my street I was standing. I can still see the unique curb in my mind. I took the melody from the Four Tops’ song, “Sugar Pie Honey Bunch” and the lyrics from a box of candy I was eating at the time. I suppose the candy-makers wanted kids to shake the box while they ate candy, hence my very cool song title.

6. My most requested childhood song composition (requested by my family at gatherings) was an ode to Al Capone, that I called “Al, Oh Al“. I was around 12-years old and for some unknown reason I was watching films and studying about him at the time. I lost all my early lyric sheets years ago, but the chorus went:

“Al, oh Al, they don’t understand you. I tried to tell them off today, but with the reputation you have, I’m afraid I didn’t get my point across.”

The first verse talked about the Valentine’s Day massacre and then I touched on some events in his life. The last verse was just too funny:

“Tax evasion got you at last. Nothing else could be pinned on you. You still fascinate me, your detached attitude too. Al, oh Al, I respect you.”

7. I heard the voice of a friend speaking to me about a week after her death. She gave me specific instructions on where to find something I needed. I mean really specific instructions that I would not have been able to figure out on my own. I know it was her.

8. I live a good part of my life avoiding citrus fruits and products made with citrus, especially citrus oil. I was not always allergic to this, but thanks to a Diazinon poisoning I endured in 1987, I have become sensitive to many ordinary, typically considered nontoxic, substances. I am so glad it is now illegal in the United States to use this horrible chemical indoors. I could elaborate on the many ways I have been debilitated by exposure, and I hope that because of the new law others will have been spared my fate. I am thinking about a blog post about how allergies impact my life, maybe I will write something in the near future. I will see.

The remaining cookie on the plate contains lemon, so sad.

9. When Gerald Ford was sworn in as President I missed most of his speech as I had passed out in exhaustion from climbing Mt. Mansfield in Vermont. I was not well-liked in my group of YMCA campers and therefore I was not allowed room in a bunk to sleep. I lay down on the bare wood floor, my head near the radio. I did not have a pillow so I used my hiking boots; the bumpiest pillow I have ever known! Everyone else stayed up to listen, and the next day they all made sure to tell me that I interrupted the broadcast with my snoring. (Well, you know, too bad! I was REALLY tired – it was a long hike.)10. I have escaped death a few times (that I know of):

at age 18 months, I had a life-threatening case of croup and survived thanks to an emergency tracheotomy which allowed me to breathe;
when I was about 11, while walking alone in the Connecticut woods, I fell into an ice covered pond but managed to pull myself out before I drowned or fell victim to hypothermia;
when I was 12 (and again, traveling alone) after visiting relatives in Florida, the airplane I was taking back to New York had some major issues over the Everglades and had to turn around. I have to say it was quite frightening, especially because the flight attendants seemed so scared; and,
in 1989, as I was crossing the street in Manhattan, I heard someone yell, “Watch Out!” right before an extremely large and heavy forklift suddenly fell off the back of a parked truck, missing me by inches. My heart was racing, and it was one of the most terrifying moments of my life. A guy standing on the sidewalk who saw the whole thing commented, “Hey, that was close, huh?” and I was just barely able to nod a yes back at him as I walked down the sidewalk (still shaking a little).

11. I once knit my husband a dark gray fisherman’s style sweater with huge cables and basket-weave stitches. It was an Elizabeth Zimmerman pattern, called “Hand-To-Hand Aran Pullover”. It was a complicated pattern and instead of the flat “zig-zag” you can see in the image of a white version I have linked here, I added a full basket-weave stitch to the front and back which made execution very difficult and so it took me over two years to complete it and a couple of pounds of wool. Unfortunately, he has never worn it, but I do have the memory of him trying it on once.

Deep sigh…I don’t knit anymore as I am focusing on my music. I had lots of the lovely thick gray wool left over. I had saved it for years but never did use it again–so, I gave it to my singing friend Connie, and she quickly knit many things from it, including a warm triangular scarf for me! (I love how it has a large carved bead at the tip of it; swings while I walk.)

12. My favorite thing in the whole world is breathing. I love breathing fresh air so much that I get a little teary just thinking about it. All my real friends know that, to me, breathing is just the best thing ever!

13. Several people in my lifetime have told me not to sing, to shut up, or not to sing jazz–that I don’t sound good doing it. Some people have tried to tell me what I should be singing because it is what they wanted to hear, or even because it was their dream to be an opera star and it didn’t work out for them so I should be an opera star. It has taken me SO MANY years to get to a place where I do not care about those negative messages. I sing what I want to now and I am a lot happier for it. (I wasted a lot of time trying to make other people happy and in the long run it did not work – they need to make themselves happy, I cannot do it for them.)

14. I love cinnamon crullers because my Papa (Grandfather who raised me, father’s side) used to buy them for me. We used to sit together in front of the firehouse in Sea Cliff and eat them out of a bag. He used to take me on day-trips all over Manhattan and Brooklyn–the Horn and Hardart’s Automat, Radio City Music Hall, Rockefeller Center, Coney Island. He always held my hand, sang funny and sweet songs to me; and was always a beacon of unconditional love.

15. I like circles and spirals, especially when they are a little quirky. Many of the patterns on the fabrics and practical items I buy have designs that include circles.

16. One hot summer afternoon, my first boyfriend, Dion, and I “cleaned” all the windows on his sun-porch with pineapple juice. He was 5 and I was 4. Yes, we got in some trouble over that. I feel sorry for Dion’s Mom now, it must have been horrible for her having to clean up that dried juice on so many small panes of glass.

[I also have a super cute photo of Dion and me sitting on a sofa and when I find it I will insert it here.]

I am reminded about another Dion story. A year later, I had a big fight with my neighbor (I can’t really call her a friend because we never got along, so neighbor suits her better.) We were both 5-years old, and her name was also Laurie. We fought because she said I was not going to marry Dion, she was. He was at kindergarten that day so he never knew we came to blows over him. I heard he now lives in Australia. Here is a photo of us; we were the “power couple” on the block!

Roses in Rome

Published by Laurie Early

Ah, yes, this photo is my first red rose of Rome, I refused it at least 3 times, yet, still, my friend bought it for me anyway. The vendor stood close to us, hovering over our dinner table at a local family-run restaurant. I had never experienced that before, salesmen coming inside a restaurant with bundles of flowers for sale. Of course, I thanked my friend, but at first I secretly wished he had not given it to me; I started to stress a little. We had only just met, why did he want to buy me a flower? How would I keep it from wilting while we ate? Where would I keep it in my little B&B room? So many stupid worries that never came about. It did not wilt as I had feared and I ultimately found a good place to display it in my room, in a drinking glass on top of a little black counter-top. It stood there, perky, all week, next to a TV I watched for about 15 minutes one day. (I caught an old episode of Colombo dubbed in Italian. It was strangely entertaining, but not enough to keep me in my room when San Lorenzo was waiting outside!)

Looking at this photo again reminds me about so much that happened that first time in Rome, my first time in Europe, so many firsts. I see the guidebook that taught me about this lovely city, and I remember making that loose sketch you can see in my notebook. (It was my attempt to recreate an etching I saw on the saxophone I happened to be seated next to in a Horns/Improvisation class.) My rose in the drinking glass reminds me of friendship because it bloomed long after I left for home–just as my friendships have. (I left the rose on the floor outside the door of the musician who had given it to me. He was staying at the same B&B that year and he told me later the bloom lasted a while longer.)

*****

Another journey across the ocean and another rose from another friend. This blossom adorned my B&B window at “Casa Della Palma”, a huge loft I shared with my older daughter and three of her friends. Our first night in the room we were startled by the loudest thunderstorm I have ever heard in my life! It really scared us while we were sleeping (well, trying to sleep.) After putting the stem into one of the bottles of acqua naturale I had bought at the corner mercato, I placed it in our little back window where it could be backlit by the morning sunlight. I was glad the storm had passed and the rose’s perfume was really lovely in the Roman air which was still fresh from the rain for days afterwards.

*****

One September I planned ahead; I scheduled an additional week with a dear friend and his family before the Barry Harris Workshop. We were to have spent these days writing songs, recording some things, eating crazy-good home-cooked meals and sightseeing the way the “locals” do it. But, it did not go as planned, because life is just that way sometimes. Due to circumstances beyond our control, my friend was not able to spend the week with me. Before he left Rome, he graciously arranged accommodations for me in a residential neighborhood near the Furio Camillo Metro stop. So, I felt safe, but still, I missed my Barry Harris Workshop friends who were in Sicily that week. I felt truly alone, trying to navigate my way through the city and also through a variety of emotions that were difficult to define at the time and unfortunately lingered through the entire trip, even after my circle of musical friends surrounded me.

During this first week of “Roman solitude”, I tried to live in the moment as much as possible. Without a schedule I floated around looking for beauty and tranquility. I found it everywhere. I spent an entire day at the Villa Borghese. Wow, words cannot describe the loveliness of the gardens there. My heart was moved by an amazing, small museum tucked off to the side of the main path, Museo Pietro Canonica. Part of the museum displays his incredibly intricate and delicate sculptures and then the other areas are his personal apartment that has been preserved as it was when he lived and worked there. So spiritual. The creative energy was palpable in the main room where he did his sculpting.

After I left the museum, I slowly walked back towards the Piazza del Popolo past some benches. As I went to sit down, I came to the bench in my photo. It was carved with many names and a small pink rose was tucked in between the upper slats. It was comforting to me to see that rose, and for that moment, sitting there on that bench, I did not feel so alone.

*****

As I was waiting for my musical friends to make the journey from Sicily to Rome I was surprised and thrilled when a talented young singer I know from the workshop wrote to me on FaceBook and invited me out to dinner with her parents. Not only was I excited by the idea of dinner with this wonderful family (OMG we had a fantastic meal in the Trastevere neighborhood) I was also grateful that they offered to take me on a night-tour of Rome in their car.

They took me everywhere! We ate gelato! They showed me how to drink water from the fountain with the “nose”. We visited a bakery after midnight and bought pastry to save for breakfast. Thanks to them I even came close to putting my hand in the mouth of truth (it was gated at night, otherwise I would have done it!) Towards the end of the evening, my friend’s Dad bought 3 roses from a vendor: one for his beautiful wife; one for his amazing daughter; and one for me. So, here I am holding my white rose with the ruins and night skyline of Rome behind me. I truly love this family. They know this; they know they have a special place in my heart. I can honestly say that this was one of the loveliest nights of my life.

*****

“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!” That is another way of saying if something works, don’t mess with it, so, when another friend (let’s call him “very tall musician number 3” *smile*) bought me this lovely red rose (from another very insistent restaurant vendor) I put it right into a bottle of water, just as I had successfully done before.

This particular year my B&B moved me to a new room mid-week. This room had a window overlooking a street lined with motorcycles and scooters. The first morning, I opened the shutters and placed my rose on the sill. Looking down I was greeted by an unexpected message spray-painted on the pavement:“Tu sei lei, e lo sei sempre stata!” I took it as a good sign that I was supposed to be there, that I was on the right path. Because sometimes, sometimes, when things are going especially well, I turn on myself. I allow thoughts of “unworthiness” to seep into my consciousness. I feel I don’t deserve this happiness somehow. It takes all my emotional strength to replace these thoughts with memories of things I have achieved, with service I have been able to provide to others because I took a risk, because I left my comfort zone. I remind myself of goals I still want to attain, and people I want to spend more time with and this usually helps me reclaim my balance, usually.

*****

I saw a fabulous rosebush in the hills of Rome. It was growing in the front garden of a friend’s house, surrounded by fresh herbs and across the path from a petite, gnarled olive tree.

These roses remind me of the hospitality of my friend and his family. They host a house-party after every workshop and the energy of the home is so positive, welcoming, and full of love. After spending the week in structured lessons and late-night, jazz jam sessions, my friends and I gather around the piano in the livingroom to sing and to jam together one last time. It is a time to spend enjoying each other’s company in a fresh, mountainous setting. Memories from these parties sustain me during the months I am away from the people I care so much about.

*****

In March I received my first yellow rose in Rome. It was given to me by a very lovely, very young girl who will one day be an amazing singer and musician. How do I know this? I know this because she is already an amazing singer and musician. I don’t think anyone has ever given me a yellow rose before and so this one was special to me for many reasons. She pulled it from a bouquet she was bringing to someone else and handed it to me. Touched me, really, and for a second my mind strayed again to the thought “I am not worthy“. But I smiled and thanked her, I hope she could tell how special the gift was to me. (We had a little bit of a language barrier.) I understand that the yellow rose represents “friendship” and “optimism” so I hope this means that I can be optimistic about returning to Rome in the future, and of continuing friendship with this talented child. She taught me some very valuable things about a jazz standard I thought I knew. Very wise girl!

*****

So…It is JUNE! I was born in the month of June, so technically the rose is my “birth flower”. I will admit it is not my favorite flower but I do like them very much, they are in my top three (*smile*). I love their fragrance. I love the memory of the miniature pink climbing roses that grew on my neighbor’s white fence when I was a child. And, these roses I have shared with you today, these “Roses in Rome” remind me of important people in my life I gave met and worked with in Italy, special places I have now been able to see and experience, and looking at them stirs up all the emotions of affection and connection with these people and places I love.

A yellow rose from a sweetie ❤

Poems for Billy Strayhorn (III)

Published by Laurie Early

In the early morning of May 31, 1967, Billy Strayhorn made his transition to another realm. In honor of him, and his musical legacy, I would like to share “Lotus Blossom”, the third poem from my series inspired by his compositions.

I was deeply moved by the recording of Duke Ellington playing this piece as an impromptu tribute to Billy. I understand that it was accidently recorded after the session for Duke’s album “And His Mother Called Him Bill” was supposed to have concluded. In the background, you can hear the other band members talking and packing up as he begins to play this intimate solo. Oh! I listened to this recording many, many, many times while I was writing the words below. You can also listen to it here: “Lotus Blossom” on YouTube*.

I wanted to compose a piece where the lotus not only described how I personally feel about Billy Strayhorn, his life, the man, the artist, and how he inspires me and countless other musicians, but one that would also describe the natural life cycle of this mystical plant. It was the juxtaposition of these two metaphors that inspired me and I hope you can see (and hear) both of these ideas reflected below.

Lotus Blossom
©2009 Laurie Early
(for Billy Strayhorn)

Transcendent lotus blossom
rising up from the darkness
your secrets untold
await to unfold and
shatter the world we knew

So many try to capture
the flower beyond their vision
They reach for your light,
mirage in the night,
shimmering azure blue

Long ago
I searched for you
and found I’d lost my way
Now you’re here
I’m not alone
and in my heart you’ll stay

Elegant lotus blossom
you are my inspiration
beauty sublime
that won’t fade with time
reflecting a love so true

Long ago
I searched for you
and found I’d lost my way
But, now you’re here
I’m not alone
and in my heart you’ll stay

Petals are gently falling
seeds drifting in the water,
floating downstream
the path where you’ve been
eternally guides us on

A beauty sublime
that won’t fade with time
eternally guides us on.

The other Strayhorn inspired poems I have posted here are: (I) My Isfahan and (II) Chelsea Bridge.

Trying to Get Through Spring

Published by Laurie Early

Spring Roses in Basel

There are so many beautiful songs about Spring–songs that cover different aspects of the weather, the flowers, themes of renewal, loss, and love. I think that the seasons resonate with everyone, at least everyone who lives in an area of the world where they set the schedule for planting, growing, harvest, and fallow. Anyone who has experienced these shifts in temperature, these quarterly phases and physical reminders of life, death and re-birth can appreciate the metaphors of Winter, Spring, Summer, and Autumn.

White tulips at midnight – Spring in NYC

The song I want to talk about today, analyze in a way, was written a few years ago. At the time, I was learning many jazz standards, all new to me, while also grieving a loss, so I happened to write a song that reflected my deep sadness, yet reminded me of all the lovely things Spring has to offer. I was especially focused on flowers I had been singing about in the other standards, or flowers that had personal meaning to me from my childhood.

So, I will attempt to dissect and explain the song lyrics a little and to indicate my inspiration for various lines and phrases. In these “backstory notes” (my lyric-writing-thought-process) you will see that I purposely personified the flowers in the lyrics as I imagined that all the living things around me were aware of my grief and were doing the best they could to comfort and cheer me. I had to open my eyes to that beauty, to acknowledge that those natural healing resources were all around me.

Hopefully, I am not being too confusing in my attempt. (All inspiration comments will be in a small italic purple font placed after each stanza.)

Wishing you all a very happy Spring ahead. -Laurie

Tryin’ to Get Through Spring Without You
©2009 Laurie Early

Daffodils are waking up, I cannot hear a sound
Hyacinths are soaking up the sunlight all around
But I just can’t seem to get my chin up off the ground
Tryin’ to get through Spring without you.

Daffodils and purple hyacinths grew on the hill behind my childhood home. Each day I would go outside and check on their growth. The daffodils’ large yellow heads would start out all sleepy and droopy, closed in on themselves, and then by mid-spring their blossoms would open and display the “trumpet” shape. I had recently learned Billy Strayhorn’s “A Flower is a Lovesome Thing” and so the daffodils were on my mind.
When I was in my 30’s I read an article about how amazing some forms of hyacinths are at soaking up toxins from the earth around them, so the idea of them soaking up the sunshine came to mind.
As far as sadness goes, to me there is nothing worse than the feeling that you can’t get out of bed and face the day, the “chin on the ground” image reminds me of my sense of lethargy that particular Spring.

No, not lilacs, but almost as lovely (Sicily, September 2015)

Lilacs grow along the road where we both walked before
Tulips standing guard around that beat-up cellar door
where I just sit and cry for I know what’s in store
Tryin’ to get through Spring without you.

Lilacs are my favorite flowers. I find their fresh scent especially intoxicating. I was reminded of a street where I used to walk, where lilacs bushes grew out towards the sidewalk, escaping through someones fence. I was also thinking about “Lover Come Back to Me” and “every road I walk along, I walked along with you.”
The visual of the very straight and stalwart tulips guarding me while I weep seated on the cellar door comes from two very different sources: The first was a song by Seals & Crofts’ “Advance Guards” which has a line about tall grass, “I used to look out from my window and see the tall grass in the wind. Standing there just like advance guards waiting for the battle to begin.”
The second was a song I used to sing, when I was 4 or 5 years old, called “Playmates“. I used to sing it all the time but especially when I sat outside my neighbor’s house on top of their cellar door, waiting for their son to come home from school so we could play. It was an old Victorian-style house and the cellar door was white with cracked and chipping paint, but I could see why it might be fun to slide down it; however, I mostly sat there by myself. Since the loss of a friend inspired “Tryin’ to Get Through Spring Without You”, my childhood song of friendship bubbled up to the surface, I had a brief vision of sitting on that old white slanted door waiting to play with someone – I had not thought about it in years: “Oh playmate. Come out and play with me. And bring your dollies three. Climb up my apple tree. Shout down my rain barrel. Slide down my cellar door, And we’ll be jolly friends forevermore.”
And, there is a pun in the line “for I know what’s in store” as that is what cellars are traditionally used for, to store provisions for those lean times. (In this case I am saying I know what’s going to happen to me next, I know I will cry for you some more, that is what’s in store for me.)

You won’t see a crocus or a snowdrop,
or feel the April rain
Robins and blue birds flyin’ over
but you won’t hear their sweet refrain
But the worst part is knowing I won’t
see your smile again, and
I’m tryin’ to get through Spring without you.

This “bridge” or “B” section is inspired by 3 songs. First, “It Might As Well Be Spring” which was a song associated with the person I was grieving: “I haven’t seen a crocus or a rosebud, Or a robin on the wing”. The crocus is one of the flowers I was always searching for as I walked to school. I knew if I saw one, Spring was coming soon. The smell of Spring made me very happy as a child. (I used to say the trees smelled like “iced tea”.) I wanted to use roses in the last stanza so instead of saying “crocus or a rosebud” I chose the snowdrop which is another flower from my childhood garden, so pretty, “so gay”, yet another blossom that droops slightly “in a melancholy way”.
Second, I was thinking about “The Gentle Rain” which I changed to “April rain” as that is what Spring is all about, the hydration of the soil, nourishment. “We both are lost and alone in the world, walk with me in the gentle rain. Don’t be afraid, I’ve a hand for your hand and I will be your love for a while.”
Third, because I was discussing and working on “Blue Skies” at the time of my friend’s passing, this stanza pulls from the images in that song. I had been overly optimistic, thinking that my gray days were gone and I would have those blue skies from now on.

Roses spread their sweet perfume everywhere they grow
Cherry blossoms in full bloom create a brilliant show
They almost cheer me up, it seems as if they know
I’m tryin’ to get through Spring without you.

Again, “A Flower is a Lovesome Thing” made me think about listing the flowers first in each line, so in this AABA song structure, as the final stanza is laid out you can see my pattern.
- Daffodils
- Hyacinths
- (A line describing what’s going on, and then the hook)
- Lilacs
- Tulips
- (A line describing what’s going on, and then the hook)
- [B Section – which traditionally gives you some additional insight, a transitional statement, or some other explanation that makes the A sections more meaningful]
- Roses
- Cherry Blossoms
- (A line describing what’s going on, and then the hook)
Sometimes imposing extra structure on myself during the drafting process causes me to be more creative in the long-run. It is a problem solving exercise then, a game, if you will, to try and stay within the structure but make it interesting and beautiful at the same time.

Tryin’ to get through Spring
(Not successfully I might add)
Tryin’ to get through Spring
(‘cause I feel so sad)
Tryin’ to get through Spring without you.

This is the “tag” section of the song, sung at the very end. Just a way to add a little more “back story” for the audience, as if I have to explain to them that I wish I could be happier but I am just not able to be happy right now.

Prelude to Spring – Singing & Learning

Published by Laurie Early

Oh man! I have been singing in Rome and having so much fun! It has been especially gratifying this month because I was able to sing a couple of original songs/lyrics that had never been performed in public before.

At one of the Barry Harris Jazz Workshop jam sessions, I was asked to sing a Bossa and chose to debut the English lyrics (called “Happiness”) that I wrote for Jobim’s A Felicidade. A couple of people approached me afterwards to tell me how much they liked my English interpretation, so that made me feel really good. It was a difficult song to transform as Portugese is so light and soft, English so harsh. I am glad people still connect to the story in English.

Early Thursday morning, before the piano class began, I was able to test out my new lead sheet for a totally original song called “West of the Sun“. I am very grateful to Tomasz Bialowolski on piano and Luca Peruzzi on bass for their gracious assistance. They made the song come to life for me and if you click here you can hear our exchange as we try out the sheet music for the first time, and at the end, a little bit of my conversation with a friend about what inspired the song. (The full lyrics are listed below.)

Best of all, last week, I was invited by my friend, Nicola Borrelli, to sing a couple of tunes with his trio at Démodé, a terrific restaurant on Via Tuscolana. If you live in Rome check it out; it is walking distance from the Subaugusta metro stop. The energy there is really positive and the food is great, fresh ingredients and served quickly. (But perhaps I am biased because I believe live jazz makes all food taste better.)

Not only have I had the luck, and honor, to meet and work with these wonderful Italian jazz musicians, but because I do not sing professionally, I also had the opportunity to see and learn what is needed to make sure a set goes well. (For example, always make sure the venue expects you, and that a working microphone is available. Or, alternatively, that someone in the rhythm section brings one with them.) Believe me, I am taking notes, because one day I will be doing more performances and knowledge is power. The feedback I received during this trip was really motivating and I hope to keep the momentum going!

Okay, here are my public thank you’s–I am so thankful to these musicians for their kind invitation to me: Giambattista Gioia, Vincenzo Lucarelli, and Nicola Borrelli. Also, a virtual hug to each of my friends who traveled to come and hear us, with a special thank you to Stefano Landini for taking time out of his evening to get us a working microphone – disaster averted.

I think you can tell how excited I am to be able to post three songs on YouTube from this March 10th performance at Démodé, Rome. Please check them out – links are below.

Flugelhorn/Trumpet – Giambattista Gioia
Piano – Vincenzo Lucarelli
Bass – Nicola Borrelli
Vocals – Laurie Early

Here are the links:

Our Love is Here to Stay

East of the Sun & West of the Moon

and, I was able to perform a new song with music by Nicola Borrelli and lyrics I wrote called The Big Mystery. (I have included the lyrics below, and also in the notes at YouTube.)

The Big Mystery
Music © Nicola Borrelli
Lyrics © Laurie Early

What kind of spell is this intoxicating kiss?
Your magical embrace captured my heart.
It’s a mystery to me how this happened
for every wall I built just fell apart

When your eyes meet with mine
my heartbeat skips each time
Your voice is like a song I’ve never heard
It’s a mystery to me why this happens
So when you speak I cling to every word

Your lips have left me weak and
I am breathless
Your eyes reveal new worlds,
my soul is restless
I’ve fallen into joyful madness
It’s true,
I fell for you

So, hold me close and tight
each day and every night
We’ll live where sunlight dances on the sea
For the world is in your arms,
that’s the mystery.
Now you are everywhere,
your love is everything
You’re everywhere and everything to me.

West of the Sun
© 2014 Laurie Early
(Title suggested by Roger Crosdale; Rome, September 2014)

In another dimension
I am yours and you are mine
Parallel to this world is a universe so fine
it’s another dimension, another dimension
made for us…

West of the Sun and next to that cloud
Up in the stratosphere, where three’s a crowd
No one there to scold us, or tell us that we’re wrong
We’re making up new verses to a romantic song
West of the sun, West of the sun

East of the Moon and close to that star
Love always follows us, knows exactly where we are
Each kiss feels just like heaven touching our lips
and all of our embraces cause a lunar eclipse.
West of the sun, West of the sun

If we slip out of alignment
and the real world makes us weep
to return a dream is needed,
baby, so slumber well and deep
Put a wish under your pillow,
swear that I’m the only one
and I will be there waiting for you
West of the sun, West of the sun

West of the Sun and East of the Moon
lies a dimension where our heartbeats are in tune
Just close your eyes, oh baby, yeah, we’ll go there now
all that is needed is that wish and a little vow
West of the Sun, West of the sun

Let’s go West! Andiamo lassu’!
Let’s go West,
West of the sun.

Journey of Imagination

Published by Laurie Early

To celebrate its 100th birthday in 2011, The New York Public Library hosted “Find the Future” which included an amazing exhibition of artifacts at their 42nd Street building, a really cool interactive event (a overnight scavenger hunt in the library for a lucky few), and corresponding online game. One of the aspects of the online game was to respond to writing prompts and then entries would be read and commented on by other “players”. In response to one of the prompts I wrote “My Worldwide Creative Journey: to visit, see, absorb, learn, and/or sing!” I have updated and changed the piece a few times in the years since I first drafted it, and I still enjoy the idea of it, this imagined journey; it reminds me of all the wonderful opportunities I still have to explore this planet.

Fortitude at NYPL (the other lion is Patience)

I find there is nothing like a change of venue to spark my creativity and to move me into a more “in the moment” mindset. I detach from my expectations and learn to enjoy what is right in front of me. Yes, before I go on a trip I make of list of things I think I would like to do, but often I find the most satisfying experiences are the small unexpected interactions and sights, not the tourist attractions. I think it’s fun to compare how common objects in another country differ from what I usually see at home. I also enjoy the variations in architecture, art, music, food, and things experienced through my senses like the smell of the air, the sound of the crowds speaking another language, the warmth of the paving stones beneath my feet.

When I travel I hear different melodies in my mind inspired by sounds from whatever place I am visiting. I don’t always capture them all, but it’s okay, I enjoy that part of the journey and don’t pressure myself into turning everything I see, hear, or do into a song.

My ideal destinations are listed below in an “around-the-world” configuration, but I am not fixed to this one-trip notion, as in some ways I am a homebody, and the “idea of travel” often makes me happier than the actual reality of getting from one place to another. Don’t get me wrong, I love when I arrive, rest, get acclimated, and enjoy my new surroundings. But because I live defensively (I have many sensitivities and therefore must avoid citrus, freshly painted places, cologne/perfumes, among other things) taking public transportation is often difficult, and I need time to recover on arrival and when I return home.

As I created my imaginary itinerary, I thought about visiting several more countries and continents, and if the political climate settles down and travel becomes safer I will may consider those destinations in the future. I was also deterred from some selections by an old mantra in my mind: “The Equator is HOT!” (I heard this once shouted by a little boy on a children’s TV program and it was so cute it stuck in my mind) so, I avoided really hot places as I am a delicate flower and need moderate climates.

My Worldwide Creative Journey

1. Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. I will start my journey off by flying to Rio! I can’t wait to see the Corcovado and Sugarloaf mountains near the sea, ride a cable car. Of course, I intend to listen to as much Brazilian jazz, samba and bossa nova as my mind can hold. If I’m lucky enough I may see & hear a sabia (singing bird) as I walk along the black and white waves of the paved sidewalk. I will allow myself to tan as I walk around, but not too much. (Sunscreen will be applied!) I’ll probably avoid Carnival season as I am not too fond of crowds, but I will try to schedule my arrival around a jazz festival. Perhaps I will learn some Portuguese and sing a little Brazilian song. In any case, I have my own lyrics that will work with Gilberto Gil’s “Refazenda” if I have to pull something out of the hat.

2. Buenos Aires, Argentina. I want to see the brightly painted houses and ceramics of Argentina that I have only seen in photos. And, I want to take my own photos! I know a lot of my time will be focused on photographing unusual doorways, walls and windows. Some of the things I want to try in this country are horseback riding, learning the tango (or at least watching some excellent tango dancers in action), and tasting that Chimichurri sauce I have heard of so much. (Then I will leave the Americas and cross the Atlantic ocean heading for the green hills where my ancestors roamed.)

3. Lochalsh, Scotland, & London, England; United Kingdom. I long to walk beside the mountains and lochs in Scotland. I would sketch the stones and ruins and visit Eilean Donan Castle. I have been to London a couple of times since I first imagined this itinerary, but my time was short and I was not able to enjoy everything the way I have dreamed, so if I get the chance to return I hope to experience more of the city life and to visit the Pizza Express Jazz Club (and other music venues.) I still haven’t seen the Chelsea Bridge or the set of Eastenders, my favorite BBC television program. But, in any case, I will make an effort to walk along the Thames again, to visit the East End, and tour some lovely Cathedrals.

4. The Hague, The Netherlands. I just happen to know a couple of lovely people who live in or near The Hague. Ideally, I would schedule my visit to coordinate with a music festival as my friends are a wonderful jazz singers and I want to see them expressing themselves in their home setting. I hope to be able to sing a song about musical experiences we have shared. Maybe a side trip to Amsterdam as I know will be drawn towards all things revolving around the Dutch Masters and Rembrandt. I will take as many mental snapshots as I can in addition to the actual photos I will take of all the many flowers and greenery, and will search out places on the canals where the boats are moored to focus on nautical subjects.

5. Paris, France. My plan is to have no plan in Paris, but to arrive during the Spring season and somehow eat at least one decadent pastry. I want to totally live in the moment and try to get by as best I can with my very limited knowledge of the French language. A totally “in the moment” experience.

6. Rome, Milan, Modena, and other cities in Italy. Even though I have been to Rome a few times (and will be there again in 2 weeks) I know I will want to return again and again as I adore the San Lorenzo area of town. At the FELT CLUB & SCHOOL they host wonderful jazz workshops twice a year. I think the city is so accessible with its interconnecting buses, trams, and trains. I hope that each time I go to Italy I will learn more and more of the language and will be continually inspired by the ancient ruins, art, music, and cuisine. I urgently wish to visit Milan and Modena and as I have friends that live, play, and teach jazz in those beautiful cities. I will eat at least one gelato since I always seem to forget to do this. Where are my priorities?

7. Belgrade, Serbia. In 2011 I was invited to jam with a jazz friend in Serbia so I added this stop to my itinerary. But I waited too long, and now he lives in New York! If he ever decides goes back to home to Serbia for a visit, maybe I could coordinate my flights to coincide (smile). I wanted to see the city through his eyes and had hoped he would drive me around showing me the sights, perhaps catching a glimpse of the Danube River at some point. He told me years ago he would show me the best places to eat and what to taste first (I would like to try a savory burek pastry – they look wonderful in photos). And, I want to visit some of the older landmarks and tour a museum or two, maybe go bicycling riding if the weather permits. I imagine this part of my journey will be relaxing and stress-free as I hang out with my friend and see what he used to do on a typical day (before he moved to my home town.)

8. Djulirri & Malarrak, Australia. So mystical! Dreaming of being surrounded by the spiritual, colorful rock art created by our ancient ancestors in Australia. I found a wonderful website called “Protect Australia’s Spirit” which is dedicated to a campaign to raise awareness and funds to document and preserve this country’s extraordinary collection of Aboriginal rock art. I want to spend some quiet, reflective time studying this work up close.

9. Tokyo, Japan. After a my peaceful time surrounded by inspiring art, I will travel to hear more friends play more jazz. (Yes, I have jazz friends in Japan too, crazy right?) Unfortunately, since I first visualized traveling there so many tragedies have occurred. So, I would expect that things are different there right now because of the after effects of the earthquake, tsunami, and all the issues surrounding Fukushima. I know my musical Japanese friends here in New York have been raising funds in order to assist their communities back home. I have heard that touring is still going on (jazz gigs in Tokyo) and I would like to support that in any way I can. During the day, I expect I will do a lot of walking and looking and absorbing all the local sights, sounds, arts and handicrafts. I am a big fan of Japanese paper goods and may try to find some to take home if I have room in my luggage. (I will pack everything up nicely for my flight over the Pacific Ocean back to North America.)

10. Talkeetna, Alaska, USA. About 20 years ago I read “Edges of the Earth: A Man, a Woman, a Child in the Alaskan Wilderness” by Richard Leo. I could not tell you chapter by chapter all the things he and his young family went through after leaving their harried business world to attempt homesteading in Alaska, but I can tell you that at the time I read this memoir, the thought of escaping to a place of freshness and natural beauty really appealed to me. I do not think I would be cut out for this type of lifestyle. It sounded like a physically difficult existence and you need to be able to accept total self-reliance, including the struggle to find and store food and maintain a shelter all on your own if need be. That would be overwhelming to me. But, In any case, I would still like the opportunity to see Denali, the wonderful mountain that is the pivot of Leo’s world, and to breathe the fresh Alaskan air in Spring, Summer or Fall.

11. Banff & Toronto, Canada. Lake Louise has always been on my list of places that I want to visit in my lifetime. I don’t know why it is that I should be so attracted to that particular lake, but I saw a photo of it about 20+ years ago and that was it – wanted to go there. I want to stay at a posh resort in or near Banff National Park and I want to see as much of the wilderness as is safe to do. In Toronto, I will visit jazz friends and time my visit so I can hear the wonderful children’s choir “We Are One” at the Toronto Center for the Performing Arts. I suppose I could walk home at this point, maybe travel back along the Long Trail like i did as a teen, but I won’t. I will take a train back to the States. I have always wanted to try a sleeper-car!

12. Reykjavik, Iceland. While I am “up North” I might just go a little higher and see Iceland. Honestly, I know nothing about the Icelandic music or art scenes. I hope to learn more about that when I arrive, but when I think of travelling to Iceland I just want to be surrounded by wide expanses of nature–volcanoes, ice, cliffs, rivers and the sea. I will go puffin and whale watching and will focus my photography on textures and colors. If I get a chance I will gaze at the Northern lights and relax and re-energize in an Icelandic thermal pool before heading to Europe.

HOME – New York City! And back to square one, my city. Time to reflect and process and manifest experience into creative activity. Ah!

Happiness

Published by Laurie Early

I am always pleased to help when someone asks me to create English lyrics for a new song, but when it is a song I have never heard before, a song that really speaks to me, really touches something in my heart, then I am thrilled. This happened last year when I was approached by a friend-of-a-friend, a wonderful New York City singer who wanted English lyrics for Jobim’s A Felicidade.

Some of you may be aware that this is the song that opens the 1959 film, “Orfeu Negro” (Black Orpheus). So when I struggled a bit to find a suitable lyric for the last phrase, instead of interpreting the original lyrics, I took a risk and tapped into the Greek legend of Orpheus and Eurydice instead, as the film is a modern telling of their sad love story. It is set in Rio de Janeiro during Brazilian Carnival but perfectly matches the original Greek tragedy’s plotline.

I am in love with this song, so beautiful and heartbreaking when you think about the story behind it.

Live in the moment! Love now! Be grateful for whatever time you have with those you love; that is the message I take away from this experience.

If you would like to listen to the original song in Portuguese, it is on YouTube. This is a great version, (and Jobim is on piano.) UPDATE: If you would like to hear a raw copy of me singing my lyrics, click here for a recent rehearsal excerpt (with Triology).

There is no end to grief
yes, happiness is brief

Happiness is like a lovely feather
that floats and falls upon a gentle breeze
dancing so lightly
its life so short and carefree
yet without wind it cannot dance for long

And the happiness of the poor is illusion
spinning us around like Carnival,
that glimmer of dreamland
we hope and we work for,
we live in that one moment,
we fulfill our fantasies
we’re pirates, we are kings,
and we’re together
but glitter turns to ashes on Wednesday

There is no end to grief
yes, happiness is brief
There is no end to grief
yes, happiness is brief

Oh, and happiness is like the dewdrop
that rests upon a petal in the morn
kissing its blossom,
so happy in the sun
Yet like a tear it falls when day is done

Happiness for me is what I’ve found in your eyes, love
tonight has been our dream
but we must waken
we’re drifting, suspended
when dawn comes it’s ended
my only wish is to keep you in my arms forevermore
when sunlight shines upon our new beginning
you’ll keep kiss me and
we’ll fall in love again

There is no end to grief
There is no end to grief….

Happiness in chalk (Basel 2015)

The 7 Deadly Sins – A 2016 Resolutions Exercise

Published by Laurie Early

Wow! It has been a very full year–travel, music, friends, family and many creative moments. One of the things I am most proud of is that I was able to post at least one article here each month. Starting and maintaining a personal website was one of my 2015 resolutions and I intend to keep going! Thank you to everyone who took the time to contact me with encouraging comments.

For 2016, from the many possible promises I could make to myself, I decided to focus on resolutions I could commit to that would nourish me as a person and as an artist /musician. I started by contemplating my 2015 achievements, and analyzing my attempts at achievement (otherwise known as brooding over my mistakes and failures.) Then, for some reason known only to my subconscious mind (is that redundant?) in the middle of this thought process I remembered something I saw recently about the “7 Deadly Sins”. Now, totally sidetracked by this concept, I will share a few random thoughts on these sins to close out 2015. Hopefully, at the end of this exercise, I will have decided (privately) on the resolutions for 2016 that are best for me. Wish me luck!

In order to have a little fun with this idea, I did a little research and discovered that in his “Divine Comedy”, Dante listed the seven sins in the order below, which is supposedly from bad sin to worst sin, but really, such a subjective thing. In fact, in order to make this a little more secular, I am going to refer to these ~~sins~~ attitudes as “states of being” because “sin” seems like a final destination, and implies a horrible punishment (as opposed to a subtle personal revelation or corresponding consequence which would result from an unsuitable state of mind.) Anyone could float into one of these mindsets, but if you are creative you can work with it, analyze the experience and maybe even benefit from the trip. I think it is important to notice when you drift towards or into one of these states, to acknowledge it and try to avoid the extreme, that to me is would be the “sin”.

[2016 Resolution idea: “Use these 7 defined attitudes for something productive, don’t let them drain your creative energy.]

Seven Really Bad States of Being to Avoid
(or 7 Attitudes to Bend to Your Creative Will, if You Are an Artist of Any Sort)

Lust — Apparently this is NOT the worst sin; who knew? You want something or someone really badly but it is just not socially acceptable or good for you personally on some level. What to do, what to do? I suppose you just have to lock yourself up ~~in a cave~~ in a studio, and create a piece that expresses your feelings, painting or song, poem or dance. I don’t think of “wanting” as such a horrible thing, longing for something propels you in a direction you might not otherwise have traveled. So many good songs are written about longing and lust, this unlawful desire; You Were Temptation springs to mind. [2016 Resolution idea: Write a nice lust-filled song.]

Gluttony — This one usually revolves around the over-indulgence in food or other pleasurable things that influence your physical body. I have also heard the phrase “you are a glutton for punishment” directed at me, although not recently so that’s good. (I’m happy that I seem to be choosing less stressful paths to my destiny.) I am picturing the “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” character, Augustus Gloop, in my mind as he disgustingly pollutes Willie Wonka’s pristine river of purified chocolate. Augustus is the epitome of gluttony because he consumes without savoring, he indulges in consuming mass quantities of food over a more intimate quality experience. [2016 Resolution idea: Incorporate some “mindfulness” into my daily routine, quietly focus on savoring sensory experiences and other physical activity.]

Greed — This one is a little tricky for me; I can’t think of anything I am really greedy about. I don’t collect anything. I like to earn money, but I don’t go crazy about it, as long as I have enough to cover the basics and a little travel now and then, I am very happy. I like sharing, almost too much. Am I greedy about sharing? Is that possible? Oh! Wait! Yes! There is one thing I am greedy about–time with certain people I care very deeply about. I look forward to hoarding all the time with them I can, to love them as much as I can, to listen and learn from them, and to take time to make sure they know how important they are to me. [2016 Resolution idea: Write to people I love and tell them why they are important to me.]

Sloth — Out of this entire list, sloth is the state I naturally gravitate towards. This is because I am inclined to be a “triple-P person”. Oh, you don’t know what that is? Well, let me tell you, that is someone who is a Perfectionist who Procrastinates and becomes Paralyzed. I constantly fight against this tendency, and I force myself to do things I don’t feel like doing at that moment because I know I will feel so much happier when it is done. I know perfection is not possible, or even preferred, especially when being creative, yet I still might wait and wait and wait for the perfect moment to write, to sing, to practice some new artistic technique. Then, you see, it is never the perfect time and so I become paralyzed and locked into this cycle of inactivity. And, what’s worse, I may even throw myself a little “pity-party” and exhaust myself further, dwelling on every little thing I have not done or did wrong. Such a waste of time on so many levels. [2016 Resolution idea: Get out of the house more – schedule and attend at least one creative event each month; no cheating, jazz workshops and other classes do not count.]

Wrath — This is not an everyday state of mind for me, this is a special state of rage reserved for those times when I feel powerless to control the world around me. 2015 has been jam-packed with horrendous tragedies around the USA and around the world. I am thinking about personal tragedies that stemmed from fear of another person’s skin color and traumas caused to groups of people because of religion or other belief systems. All fear-based, all sad, and my old limbic system (the fight part) starts to kick in and I want some sort of justice, but what can I do? I am just one person. Thanks to social media I am able to see at least 2 sides of these local and global stories, the horror of the acts themselves and the reactions and subsequent actions of people of goodwill. I can only hope that by being the best person I can be, and by weeding out any fears I may personally harbor towards people who believe differently about things than I do, and encouraging others to do the same, that at some time in the near future there will be a tipping point in the world. People of action, with just and kind hearts, will be in the majority and everyone will finally recognize there is only one race, the human race. [2016 Resolution idea: Create some sort of artistic work that expresses the idea of focused personal introspection leading to race and religious unity on a global level.]

Envy — Oh yeah, HATERZ, I know all about them. I never understood how people can think that all the negative energy they are sending out through hating isn’t floating right back on them! So silly really, another waste of time and energy. About 6 or 7 years ago, I went to sing at a local jam session and I was talking to a very young drummer (can’t remember his name but he was very sweet) and someone walked by and I casually said “Oh, she hates me” and the drummer got all excited and said “Wow, you have haters? Man, that’s great! If you have haters you must be really good. The more haters you have the better you are.” So, if I find myself envious of something someone has or something they are able to do, I try to figure out what it is that I need to do, what quality am I lacking; then I work on that. Don’t get me wrong, I am still envious of people with kitchens, and I will keep working on that. This special kitchen-envy probably won’t resolve itself until I have at least a semblance of a kitchen (instead of the stove and sink built into a wall that I currently struggle to successfully use each day without injuring myself or dropping food that I thought I had wonderfully balanced on the edge of the sink.) [2016 Resolution idea: If I sense that I am feeling a little envy, I will write it down in my notebook and then figure out what the real issue is and try to resolve that for myself.]

Pride — The start of it all, the ego, the “I am everything / I am nothing” that playground see-saw that I ride all the time. There is a need to be loved and accepted by others and also a need to be self sufficient. I am the only person that I know really well, and even after having said that about myself, I don’t know anything about my true self. What is going on in my subconscious mind? Right now I could not tell you because I am awake. In dream states I am able to capture a glimpse of what my mind is planning or analyzing or struggling with as I concentrate on my immediate needs like eating, communicating, working and expressing my creative impulses. It seems to me that everyone struggles with this imbalance and that the goal should be to stay in the middle of that see-saw and to stay as centered and as level as possible, never veering to one side or the other too far and thereby not taking one’s self too seriously or for granted. [2016 Resolution idea: Make a list of my strong, weak, and neutral qualities and see think about what I can do to add or continue more balance. I will mimic the funny Stuart Smalley skit from Saturday Night Live and remind myself what I should be proud of in myself.]

I will be drafting my private 2016 resolutions shortly and in the unlikely event I ever forget that there is always time to do something fun and creative each day I resolve to watch the video I linked to in Envy on the word “HATERZ” and I will sing along with that policeman!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!